In a Sea of Un-Truths

After meeting Mr. Gorgeous on that fate-filled night in the summer of 2000, I began to date (and a lot). I dated guy after guy after guy and each guy was more un-truthful than the last. It was like I was swimming in a sea full of liars!! I dated one guy, who shall be named Brian (this time to protect the guilty) who lied about his name, where he went to school, what was his major, and on and on and on. Although he was not the last guy I dated, he was one of the ones that left a bitter taste in my mouth. I could not trust, I could not believe that a guy was being up-front, and I did not know if I would ever meet someone who was truly honest.

Since I had dated so many guys in Austin after that summer of 2000, I spread my wings and was habitually dating guys in Dallas. This was even worse than dating guys in Austin! In 2002 I dated several guys who were just as dishonest as the ones in Austin and would break it off over email...real class acts. 

So fast forward to February 2, 2003, and I am truly frustrated. I remember thinking I am never, ever, ever (thanks Taylor Swift for the line) going to meet anyone. I feared that I was going to be alone for the rest of my life, and that was not something that I longed for. That night I logged onto the gay-social media engine of the time. I thought that I would try my hand in Austin again and I scrolled through who was online. The engine was just updated because you could see pictures next to the profiles now! As I was scrolling, I saw none other than that Peter guy!! My heart raced, my blood was pumping, and I struggled to say something in chat that was not horrible, stupid, or dorky. We chatted for a bit and finally I said something along the lines of 'we met before at Rainbow Cattle Company...Bobby introduced us'. His response? "I'm sorry I don't remember meeting you." 

Um, excuse me? You don't remember me??! Oh great, this is going to turn out just swell!! (This was one of the rare times when my inner dialogue worked and I refrained form typing that). But still we continued chatting and by the end of the night he gave me his email address. A couple of weeks earlier a friend told  that he would get email addresses for guys he wanted to date, emailed them with his phone number and left it up to the guy to see if he wanted to call or return the email. So I thought...what the hell...nothing else was working...let's try that.  But do I email him right away? Do I email him that night?? What to do, what to do....

Oh hell, let's just fire off an email saying how much I enjoyed our chat and give him my number. I checked my email before going to work the next day and hoped for a return email from this Peter guy...no luck. I was heartbroken, but not completely sad because I had enjoyed myself so much just getting to know him. That evening, nothing. The next morning nothing. But Tuesday afternoon I came home and voila...an email was waiting for me. "I will try and give you a call Wednesday night after work. I get off at 9:00".

Woo Hoo!!  That was tomorrow!!! Let's just say I was a wreck Tuesday night and Wednesday So at about 9:15 he calls...we chat just like we did online and it was great. He was laughing, I was making him laugh, the charm was a-workin'!! And then there it was..."What are you doing Friday night?" Wait...He just asked me out!  Don't fuck this up, Darrel...whatever you do DO NOT FUCK THIS UP!!! I casually agree to go out with him and we end the phone conversation. I remember thinking to myself, please God, please do not let this one be another ship in the sea of un-truths.